I Left the Womb for This
by Cat face
Summary: It's about growing up, it's about changing, it's about friends, relationships, school, work and everything in the middle. Basically it's about life.
1. Part One

I Left the Womb for This

This is it, Chuckie thought to himself excitedly. Here she was, alone with him, looking beautiful and sexy in her low cut shirt. There could only be one thing on her mind if she'd troubled herself enough to squeeze into that mini skirt and those boots. Her skin glowed and her eyes sparkled with the same cheap glitter makeup that Kimi wore in her hair. This is it.

            "Chuckie?" She said waving her hand in front of his face, "can I come in?"

            "Oh right!" Chuckie quickly stepped aside and ushered her in, "Sorry,"

            "That's alright," she said with a quick smile, "I just needed to ask you something…"

            Chuckie grinned and a million dirty questions raced through his mind. He was so glad Tommy had agreed to take Kimi off his hands just for a few hours tonight ("Or maybe more" He had promised with a wink.)

            "Did you want something to drink?" Chuckie asked quickly distracting himself and cutting her off before she could speak.

            "Yeah… sure." 

            He led her into the kitchen where she sat at the breakfast bar and watched him intently while he poured her a drink. It was slightly unnerving, the way she never once removed her eyes from him, the way she followed his every move. Unnerving and kind of attractive, but that could have just been the hormones. 

            "Listen Chuckie I can't stay too long, I really just wanted to ask you something."

            "Mmm," Chuckie mumbled only half listening, her shirt was hanging very low.

            "Umm, your friend Tommy he- he's got a girlfriend doesn't he?"

            "Yeah, my sister Kimi."

            "How long have they been dating?"

            "The hell should I know? Why does it matter?"

            "Well… the truth is..."

            "Oh… no, you don't" 

            Of course, it was only too obvious. The only reason she had come over here was to ask about Tommy. Tommy, Tommy, Tommy. How fucking obvious. They all loved Tommy, he was like some mythological sex god whom all the girls pined after, like a movie star. And there he was, Chuckie, stuck in the background behind thick lens glasses. 

            "I know it's stupid and he has a girlfriend and everything but I really like him." She explained quickly and apologetically, "Do you reckon you could, you know, tell him or something?"

            "What good would that do?" Chuckie burst out, she flinched away from him

            "Well it wouldn't hurt to try." She retaliated boldly, scrunching her face up in the same rage as Chuckie

            "I don't believe this, every time I get attention from some hot chick it turns out their chasing Tommy well, newsflash sweetheart, he's currently fucking someone you'll have to check back later."

            Her face went through a range of emotions. Shocked, angry, scared and lastly tears began to well up in her eyes. Once Chuckie calmed down enough to see her properly guilt began to build up inside of him and he started to regret bursting like he had. 

            "Look I'm sorry-"

            "No, don't be sorry," She choked. She composed herself and slid off the breakfast bar stool, "I just wanna ask you one more thing."

            Chuckie bit his bottom lip apprehensively, he'd have to answer whatever she asked truthfully, he was too guilty to lie.

            "Did you only ask me over here to have sex with me?"

            Chuckie blanched, and she nodded knowingly. Without another word she left, her head hung morosely. This night hadn't gone quite as Chuckie had envisioned it. In fact, it couldn't have gone worse. He threw himself on the couch in front of the TV, tried and failed to concentrate on the moronic whine of late night talk show hosts. When Tommy and Kimi walked in the front door fifteen minuets into Conan O'Brian Chuckie had fallen asleep on the couch. 

            "Don't take it so hard Chuckie," Kimi said consolingly when she caught Chuckie brooding over a half eaten bowl of cereal the next morning

            "Don't take what hard?" He pouted slapping the back of his spoon on the cereal and watching spots of milk form around his bowl

            Kimi sighed and hoisted herself onto the counter beside Chuckies cereal. They sat for a moment in silence before Chuckie sighed and muttered "We better go to school."

            Kimi nodded, climbed down off the counter and followed him out the door. They walked in silence for a few blocks, and it drove Kimi crazy.

            "Do you want to talk about it Chuckie?" 

            "Talk about what?" Kimi heaved an exasperated sigh

            "About last night, what happened? You've been sooking all morning."

            "I have not been sooking," Chuckie said defensively, Kimi sighed again

            "What happened with your date?" 

            "Nothing,"

            "Nothing at all?"

            "That's right," Chuckie started bitterly, "nothing happened because the only reason she even agreed to come over was to ask about Tommy. That's the only reason anyone even talks to me, to ask about their god Tommy."

            "Chuckie…" Kimi said, but she couldn't finish the sentence. 

            She didn't want to lie just to placate him, he would see through that in a second. But as it went she'd have to lie so as not to hurt his feelings. The truth was a lot of girls liked Tommy and saw Chuckie, his best friend, as a means of getting closer to him. And here Chuckie was thinking every girl in the world was obsessed with Tommy (even his sister) when he really had absolutely no taste in women. Most of the girls he chased were notorious sluts, or notorious for dressing or pretending to be sluts. He was seventeen, after all, and his hormones were high of course he'd be chasing the girls with the pheromones. 

            "I'm never gonna get laid," Chuckie said suddenly and Kimi stared at him for so long she nearly ran into a fire hydrant

            "What makes you say that?"

            "Look at my record Kimi, every girl I've even come close to fucking ends up having some obsession with Tommy."

            "Maybe you shouldn't just look to fuck someone then." Kimi blurted before she had time to think

            "That's easy for you to say, you're getting it nearly every night."

            "Chuckie, please, can we not talk about this."

Chuckie fell silent again. He was pouting at the ground, kicking every little pebble out of his way or otherwise scraping his feet on the ground. Ever since junior high where Chuckie had discovered, and taken an unprecedented liking to rebellion he had become increasingly moody and insolent. He modeled himself after Punk rocker Johnny Rotten to some extent, when he felt like it, when he was in that mood. Other times he'd just sneer at anyone who tried to tell him what to do. Kimi knew it was just a phase, but a lot of his friends had become concerned, saying he had changed for the worse.

            It hurt Kimi a lot seeing him like this, depressed and resentful. His obvious jealousy of his best friend and her boyfriend Tommy was also a point of concern. Kimi felt it was her duty as his sister to meddle in his business weather he liked it or not. And she knew just the person to set him up with.

* * * *

"Do you realize we only have two weeks of school left?" Phil exclaimed as they walked into school

            "Yes I realized Phil, just like a realized yesterday when you pointed it out." Lil replied slightly exasperated. 

            "Can you imagine what it's gonna be like never having to go to school again? I can't wait."

            "Well I don't know about you but I plan on going to college,"

            "Well, yeah, but college is different isn't it? It's nothing like high school, you don't even have to go to class if you don't want." Phil closed his eyes and smiled slightly, several people had to skit around him as he walked through the hall blindly

            "It's still school stupid," 

            "Please, don't ruin this for me Lil," Phil said cheerfully, "I'm savoring the moment." 

            "Why don't you wait till we actually finish school to savor the moment?"

            "It'll be too late then."

            Lil sighed and said no more. It was no use arguing with Phil when he was in this mood, he didn't even realize he was having an argument. It wasn't like Lil wasn't excited about finishing school, she just took a different viewpoint. It was scary, finishing school, there's the whole wide world ahead of you and what has school really prepared you for? Sitting through boring lectures and exams. There's so much more to life than just that, and it's all dumped on you at one time. 

            It wasn't just that either, it was all the friends she'd made, all the friends that she'd have to leave behind. Growing up meant change and not everyone changed the same way. Chuckie was a perfect example, how much he'd changed from the shy, nervous wreak he was in their younger years to the confident, nonchalant punk with absolutely no regard for the rules. If anything he went out of his way to break them. If good old reliable Chuckie could change that much in a matter of years, imagine how much everyone else would change when life slapped them in the face. Imagine how much she would change. Leaving high school would be great, liberating, but leaving behind the security of lifetime friendships would be the most difficult thing she'd ever done. 

            The bell for class rang and Lil pushed her thoughts to the back of her brain. It was depressing thinking like that before class, she only wished she could take Phil's perspective on the situation. Happy go lucky, a big wide world of opportunity and all the time in the world to play videogames. If only.

            Lil filed her way into the class and automatically went to take the seat next to her twin brother Phil. The seat, however, was taken by a perky, rather ditzy short haired girl Lil knew as Kathleen. She and Phil seemed engrossed in a conversation about a cartoon they used to watch as children called Reptar. Kathleen kept referring to it as a 'classic' and, for no reason at all, that annoyed Lil.

            Lil was resigned to sit next to a girl she knew by face and not by name. They didn't speak once and the class seemed to drag on forever without the ever present distraction of Phil. Funnily enough she absorbed less information that lesson than any lesson she spent next to Phil, and their final exam was in just a few days. Lil pondered this for a moment and decided not to worry about it. 

            Lil had thought very little about Phil's relationship with this Kathleen girl, their growing closeness hadn't gone unnoticed it just hadn't been acknowledged. In fact, if she hadn't run into Kathleen in the girls' bathroom several days later she would have dismissed it completely. 

            'Run into' Kathleen probably wouldn't describe the scene that otherwise perfectly normal lunch time. Lil walked into the girls' bathroom where it appeared Kathleen had been waiting for her. Without explaining herself at all Kathleen checked the cubicles and hastily proceeded to lock the door.

            "What do you want?" Lil blurted out, thoroughly confused.

            "Listen Lil I don't want you spreading this around the school." Kathleen said, giving Lil a hard stare.

            "Spreading what?"

            "I need to talk to you about something."

            Lils stomach dropped. She didn't like people talking to her about things, especially things they found important or secretive enough that she couldn't tell anyone. Lil had an unfortunate habit of telling other people's secrets when conversation ran low.

            "You've got to swear not to say anything though," Kathleen implored, her stare softening

            "Not to say anything about what?"

            "It's about Phil." Kathleen noticeably blushed. Lil didn't notice, her stomach had dropped another notch. Was there something about her brother she didn't know?

            "What?"

            "I didn't know how to tell him, so I figured since you guys are twins maybe you could, you know, talk to him."

            Lil blinked owlishly, was Kathleen trying to tell her what she thought she was trying to tell her?"

            "I really like him Lil but I'm too scared to say anything."

            Lil heaved a relieved sigh and proceeded to laugh

            "You like my brother? Why?"

            "Well… I don't know, it's just…" Kathleen blushed a deeper red and fell silent

            "I'll break it to him slowly." Lil assured her with a friendly pat on the shoulder. 

            "Don't make it sound like I'm obsessed or anything," Kathleen said quickly

            "Don't worry, you can leave it up to me." Lil smiled to herself. She didn't like Kathleen a lot, but Phil hadn't had a girlfriend in years (not that he cared much) and he could do a lot worse. 

* * * *

Life was swell. Life couldn't be better. School would be over for good in a week, he'd never have to worry about making assignment deadlines, sitting exams, socializing. He could let himself go, sit around the house all day in his underwear if it so pleased him. Yup, as far as Tommy was concerned life was just peachy. 

            Why, then, did he feel so down? Why was it every time he saw his girlfriend Kimi he wanted to be anywhere but where she was? Why did his best friend glare at him and talk to him in a voice dripping with sarcasm? Why did girls write him creepy letters telling him they were ready to commit suicide because they loved him so much? 

            "You know what it is Tommy," Angelica said knowingly, snatching the letter from Tommy's grip, "these chicks are nutcases, I've seen it all before, they seek out some pretty boy and obsess to no end."

            "Tell me something I don't know," Tommy mumbled rubbing his temples with his thumbs

            "Just ignore them, they'll either get over it or kill themselves."

            "That's easy for you, you're not the one their killing themselves over."

            "Ah who cares, one less crazy person in the world."

            Angelica, who seemed to believe the case was closed, ripped up the letter and tossed it in the garbage. Tommy however couldn't forget about it that easy. Why would someone write something like that, he was sure he'd never met this girl before in his life. 

            "Don't worry about it kid," (Angelica had taken to calling Tommy 'Kid' ever since she had gone away to college, even though she was only two years older than him.)

            "Yeah," Tommy nodded his head once and let his hang where it stopped.

            "Why don't you call Kimi? She'll get your mind off it,"

            "No, I think I'm just gonna go to bed."

            "It's four thirty."

            "Oh…"

            Angelica sighed dramatically. Her poor young cousin was going through that ever familiar teenage depression. The kind that didn't need a cause, but was there nonetheless. She had vague memories of something like that during her high school years, but it had been so irrelevant, even then, that even remembering it seemed embarrassing. There was only one thing that could cure teenage depression and that was weed and booze. Angelica didn't particularly like weed but she was sure her aunt and uncle had some sort of alcoholic treasure trove in the house. 

            "Angelica, dear I've set you up in the spare bedroom, you can unpack your things if you like." 

            "Thanks aunt Didi," Angelica smiled angelically. The booze would have to wait. 

            Ever since her parents divorce Angelica had an unfortunate falling out with her mother and had severed any ties they one had. She hadn't seen or spoken to her in three years and that suited Angelica just fine. Her father had simply packed up and moved state as soon as it happened and, while Angelica would live with her father during most breaks from college, she had decided to give him his space during his mid life crisis and stay with her aunt and uncle for a few months. At any other time in his life Tommy would have been against Angelica's staying but in the two years he hadn't seen her they had both matured somewhat. 

            "I know what'll get your mind off those crazy girls," Angelica suggested as Tommy flopped on her newly made bed in the spare room, "Why don't you call everyone over and we can have a little reunion."

            "Why don't you call everyone over." Tommy mimicked sarcastically

            "Don't make me tickle you punk," Angelica said holding her hands above Tommy's torso

            "Don't," Tommy said, and for the first time since she'd arrived he smiled

            "Then get your butt downstairs and start calling people."

            "It's the middle of the week, no one's gonna want to come over. They have homework,"

            "You have a week of school left how much homework could they possibly have? Stop making excuses for them and just call." Angelica began to move in on Tommy, her fingers wiggling madly

            "Alright," Tommy laughed, "Alright I'll call them."

            "That's better."

* * * * 

AN: That's the end of part one. I'm not sure how many parts there'll be this is kinda one of those stories that has a loose plot but the rest just fills itself in as I go. I must apologize as well, I wasn't exactly a fan of the original Rugrats (big fan of the spin-off 'All Grown Up') so if anything in the story is wrong drop me a line or, make good use of the review thingy and just correct me there. Also, I wasn't quite sure about the ages of all the characters so I'm going by All Grown Up where all but Angelica and Susie seem to be in the same year lever. 


	2. Part Two

I Left the Womb for This 

Part Two

"I told you so,"

            "What? What'd you mean?"

            "They're all busy Angelica,"

            "Busy? What a lie, how could they be too busy for the great Tommy Pickles?"

            "Lil is at work, Phil's more interested in the TV and Chuckie wouldn't give me a straight answer but basically both he and Kimi are busy."

            "Wouldn't give you a straight answer?"

            "Yeah he was really sarcastic."

            "Well he's certainly changed a bit hasn't he? Little punk."

            "You have no idea… Anyway we all agreed that Friday night would be the best time."

            "You graduate on Friday don't you?"

            "Yeah,"

            "Perfect, and don't worry kid I'll supply the alcohol."

            "Great."

* * * *

"Gather round now class, since all our final exams are out of the way and there's nothing else to do I thought we'd do a little activity." Mr. Harris, the eccentric English teacher who claims he'd written poetry in the deepest heart of Brazilian jungles where the pygmies spoke ancient Latin and recited passages from the holy Bible.

            "Move your desks around in a circle, we'll go round the group one by one and you can all tell me what you wanted to be when you were young compared to what your career path is now at the end of your schooling." He smiled widely and helped a few students move their desks.

            Kimi started moving her desk in closer to the rest of the group and beckoned for her brother Chuckie to do the same. He crossed his arms over his chest and refused to move, despite the fact that his desk was almost in the centre of the circle.

            "Come on now Chuckie," Mr. Harris said grabbing Chuckie's desk and moving it slightly to the side

            "I don't see the point of this activity Sir," Chuckie said haughtily. Kimi sighed, he always thought he knew better than the teacher and that had gotten him into quite enough trouble in their high school years

            "Chuckie, just play along," She implored, giving Chuckie her best puppy dog eyes. He smiled slightly, rolled his eyes very dramatically, and moved his desk closer to the edge of the circle.

            "Since you're being so insolent Mr. Finster, you can go first." 

            "What am I supposed to do again?"

            "Just tell us what you wanted to be when you were young, and what you want to do when you finish high school. Do you want to go to college? Do you want to start a trade or do you want to work at Seven Eleven all your life."

            "I don't work at Seven Eleven, but now that you mention it…" Chuckie grinned and Mr. Harris sighed

            "When I was little," Chuckie started loudly, "I wanted to be a movie star, but I realized I wasn't pretty enough. So then I wanted to be a fighter pilot, but I can't because I wear glasses. So then I wanted to be fire fighter, but you have to be really buff so you can pose for the calendars. So _then_ I decided I'd be a welfare bum for the rest of my life. It's easy, lazy, and doesn't require more than a second grade education. I can do that."

            "And what do you want to do when you finish high school?" Mr. Harris said hopefully

            "I want to mooch money off the government."

            Mr. Harris sighed again and shook his head. "You're a lost cause Finster."

            "Man," Phil, who was also in their English class, spoke up, "I remember when you were little you were such a wimp, and admit it, you wanted to be a ballerina."

            "Hardy Har," Chuckie said, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "This coming from Mr. 'I Want to Eat Worms for a Living.' I hear circus freaks are big in Russia, you can finally realize your dream."

            Phil chuckled good naturedly at Chuckie's dry humor, and Chuckie grinned to himself. As much as he tried he could never get to Phil and oddly enough he admired that. Most of his friends had resorted to calling him nasty or narky whenever he was in a foul mood. Maybe it just went over Phil's head, but he doubted that very much.

            "Moving right along," The teacher said, louder than necessary, and around the class students explained their life long ambitions. Firefighter, hairdresser, movie star, pop star, sports star. 

            "And Kimi, what did you want to be when you were younger?"

            "An assassin." A wave of laughter swept over the class, Chuckie laughed the loudest

            "It's funny because it's true," He said between giggles, "I remember when she used to dress like a ninja and jump on me off the stairs," The class had fallen silent by this point but Chuckie continued, "And then when I broke her plastic sword she told me I was on the top of her hit list. Remember that?"

            "Chuckie…" Kimi pleaded softly, trying and failing to tell him with her eyes to shut his gob

            "And remember when you said you wanted to be a black widow?" Kimi smiled mechanically, a soft blush creeping onto her cheeks, "You had no problems with sleeping with men for money."

            "That's enough Finster," Mr. Harris said sternly, and Chuckie continued to grin to himself

            "And what do you want to do when you finish high school Kimi?" Mr. Harris asked hopefully

            "Fashion design," Kimi lied. The teacher seemed content with her answer, and he moved on around the class

            She couldn't believe her brother sometimes. Looking at him now smiling to himself, he didn't even realize he'd embarrassed her. In her youth maybe, yes, she had been a bit strange and obsessed but from the sideway glances people were giving her she knew they didn't understand at all. She was young and watched too many movies, of course she'd have bizarre ideas in her head that was what youth was all about. As for sleeping with men for money, not even Chuckie understood her black widow phase. It wasn't prostitution. 

            Why was she even arguing with herself about that? She knew perfectly well what she had intended when she said black widow. It was just childish innocence really, games, pretend. She had never really known what she wanted to do once she left school. She resented looking too far into the future, setting goals which she knew she would never accomplish. She had a vague image of herself in college, but she didn't know what she would study. She wasn't particularly good at anything, average at best. She just wanted to take things as they came, was that such a bad thing?

            Around her the rest of the class talked and laughed happily, their activity forgotten and the teacher in deep conversation with one of the 'brighter' students. Kimi, however, had begun to feel very low. The feeling followed her to math class, to history class, through lunch time and fell to dead low during art class.

            "What's the matter Kimi, you've been sulking all day." Chuckie piped up from beside her at the work desk. She was doodling in her notebook a picture of herself stuck in a glass box. 

            "I don't know Chuckie, all this talk about finishing high school and going to college just annoys me." 

            "Why's that?"

            "Because I don't even know what I want to do at college. I mean, I applied for all those different courses, but I don't really want to do any of them."

            "I thought you said you wanted to be a fashion designer," Chuckie said simply and Kimi scoffed

            "Yeah right, I don't know the first thing about fashion.

            "You're a lot more fashionable than most of the girls around here," Chuckie replied consolingly, though she detected a great amount of spite in his voice. 

            "But I don't want to be a fashion designer,"

            "So don't be one, who really cares anyway, just do whatever the hell you want to do."

            Kimi smiled, despite her brother's bluntness that was precisely what she wanted to hear. Chuckie smiled back and for just a moment she saw the old Chuckie. The clumsy, shy, loveable Chuckie she remember from her childhood and she wished just for a moment he'd drop the tough guy act and just be himself again.

            "Kimi Finster," The art teacher called loudly and beckoned her over to her desk

            "Yes miss?" Kimi nervously took a seat opposite the teacher, who stared at her over the unruly mess of papers and art supplies strewn over the desktop. 

            "I wanted to talk to you about your marks in this class," Kimi's stomach lurched, talking about marks was never a good thing, "your art is good Kimi, but I'm afraid not one single piece matches the curriculum. We're in high school now Kimi, drawing cartoons just isn't acceptable. And quite frankly many of the themes present in your artwork isn't suitable or accepted by this school. I regret having to fail you Kimi, I really do."

            Kimi was shocked, to say the least. The teacher continued talking but there was simply too much information for her stunned brain to acknowledge. She stood up from the seat, stared at the teacher for a moment longer before walking out of the room in a zombie like trans. As she wandered down the hall she wondered why the teacher hadn't said something earlier. Then her mind rationalized, that look in her eye was so obvious, she wanted Kimi to fail. It was the only conclusion. The teacher was so jealous of her work that she purposely led her to believe she was passing the class that whole time when she was actually failing miserably. 

            Kimi sat down by the girls' bathroom and stared down the hall. She was horrified, angry, sad, disappointed but she couldn't feel anything at the moment over the numbness. She wanted to cry, and before she knew it thick warm tears were rolling down her cheeks.

            The bell for end of class left and around her she people bustled and talked and laughed and ignored her hunched form. Graduation was only a few days away and she'd have a big fat fail right under Art. They might even send her to summer school to make up for it. She'd be stuck with the weirdo's and dumbasses. 

            "Do you know how many classes I failed?" Kimi shook her head miserably at Chuckie's question. At some point he had sat down next to her by the girls' bathroom despite the stares of passers by, "I failed art as well. And I failed that computer class. Kimi, I came so close to failing English it's not funny, and I've been speaking English practically my whole life."

            Kimi would've smiled, but the tears kept coming and the sobs kept wracking her body. Chuckie put his arm around her shoulder and said lovingly

            "I think you're the best artist in the whole school,"

            "You're only saying that because you have to." 

            Who cares what that stupid old bat says," Chuckie covered quickly, "She wouldn't know a Picasso if it slapped her in the face."

            "But she failed me," Kimi said, "She failed me because I didn't get a chance to explain anything. She didn't understand."

            "Please don't cry Kimi," Chuckie said desperately, "It'll all work out in the end I promise."

            "I wish I could believe you Chuckie," She sniffed suddenly feeling rather embarrassed she had burst into tears like she did, "I really wish I could believe you."

* * * *

"Did you see Kimi today?"

            "Yeah she looked pretty down,"

            "What was it about?"

            "I don't know."

            "Watch for other cars Phil." Lil grabbed Phil's arm, as if that action could possibly make the car stop. Unlike many of her friends Lil had gotten her drivers license as soon as she possibly could. She didn't want to waste time walking too and from places. She hadn't taken drivers ED as a slack off class, and it was well worth it. All except now, she didn't even remember how she had been roped into teaching Phil how to drive.

            "Oh come on there's none coming,"

            "It's a stop sign Phil, it means you have to stop and watch for other cars."

            "Yeah that's what they try tell you."

            "Because it's the law Phil, do you want to pass your driving test?" Phil glared at Lil and she pointed to the windscreen, her eyes wide with anger

            "No Lil I want to spend all that money to fail the test."

            "Then stop being such an ass and drive properly." Phil mumbled something under his breath in an annoying high pitched voice and they both fell silent. Of course, it being Phil who was in the car with her, the silence didn't last long

            "I heard Tommy was gonna dump Kimi, maybe that was what she was crying about."

            "Why would he dump her? They've been dating for ages." Phil shrugged and fell silent, concentrating all his efforts into avoiding school children who ran haphazardly across the suburban roads.

            Lil, however, was concentrating, perplexed, on Phil's last comment. Tommy dump Kimi, she didn't understand. They had started dating almost a year and a half ago and neither of them had shown any signs of disinterest. Their relationship was something Lil, everyone, had taken for granted. If that could fall apart so easily, without anyone knowing, what else was falling apart right under her nose? The thought scared Lil more even than Phil's constant jerking of the steering wheel.

            "This car has power steering Phil, you don't need to pull it so hard, just keep it steady." Lil said automatically, not even bothering to listen to Phil's smart ass response.

"I can't believe Tommy would just dump Kimi like that," Phil said, causing Lil's stomach to churn, "I mean, they were just so perfect together."

            "Yeah," Lil tried to push her negative thoughts out of her head, she could be so pessimistic when she wanted to, "I think we should head home now Phil, I've got to get ready for work."

            "Mrs. Fancy Pants I Gotta go to Work. Just five more minuets." Phil pleaded, stopping the car in the middle of the road

            "Phil you can't stop in the middle of the road, there's cars coming behind us. And no, I don't want to be late for work, the boss will kill me." 

            Phil smiled to himself slightly as he began driving again, but it was no laughing matter. Lil's boss was a monster, literally. She wouldn't be surprised if he really did try to kill her if she was late. He was mean and chauvinistic and blamed her for everything that went wrong, even though most of the time it was that dumbass Anthony who dropped drinks or broke china. He ever tried to convince her one day she wasn't allowed a break during a ten hour shift. She'd told a few people about her poor working conditions, and they had all told her the same thing. And she really would quit if she could, but she needed the money too bad.

            When they arrived home she hurriedly showered and dressed and drove to work. She arrived ten minuets early and her co-worker Anthony was desperately trying to serve the throng of customers that mobbed the front desk.

            "Where have you been?" He asked desperately, ignoring a woman's impatient shouting

            "What'd you mean? I don't start for another ten minuets. Where's the boss?"

            "Asleep out the back."

            "What?" Lil dumped her stuff behind the counter and hastily began serving people coffee and cake, "Why didn't you wake him up?"

            "Yeah right," Anthony snorted, "That'd be like poking a sleeping dragon in the eye. I'd rather deal with the customers."

            Lil, in any other situation would have been furious, but she was so inundated with impatient customers she didn't have time to feel anything. After half an hour of furiously serving people the crowd died down and she was able to start serving tables instead of being stuck behind the counter.

            She walked around the small café with a pot of coffee asking people if they wanted refills. She spotted Chuckie's almost dreadlocked fiery red hair as soon as he entered the shop. He and Kimi took a seat at a far table and she meandered over toward them.

            "Hey Lil how's work?" Chuckie asked pleasantly, Kimi smiled weakly at her. She looked as if she'd been crying.

            "Awful as usual," Lil replied good naturedly, leaning up against the table

            "You should quit if it's so bad Lil, stick it to your stupid boss." Kimi said encouragingly, though it sounded kind of hollow and forced, as if her mind were elsewhere.

            "Yeah," Lil agreed halfheartedly, her mind also on Kimi and Tommy's relationship. Chuckie left the table without a word and strolled up to the front counter to order

            "Did you and Tommy really break up?" Lil asked, sliding into Chuckie's empty seat

            "What?" Kimi's eyes widened in shock, "No what gave you that idea?"

            "Well you looked like you'd been crying heaps," Lil explained quickly, a warm rushing of relief spreading over her.

            "No, I'm just feeling down that's all." Kimi said with a small smile

            "So you and Tommy are all good?"

            "As far as I know, yeah." Kimi began to look suspicious so Lil decided not to take it any farther.

            "Well, give me a call tonight I gotta get back to work." Lil stood up just as Anthony called to her for help with the front counter. Kimi smiled again, a lot wider this time, and nodded her head.

            Even though her boss was an ass and stayed asleep the entire night and neither she nor Anthony had the courage to wake him. Even though the customers were rude, even though Anthony was hopelessly clumsy Lil couldn't help but be in a good mood. Kimi and Tommy weren't breaking up; maybe she had just been too paranoid about finishing school and facing change. Things couldn't change that much, that fast, could they?

AN: Okay I know this chapter is weird but it'll all come together soon. Bear in mind that, while I intend to put romance in this story, it's also a story about other things in life that people have to deal with. Just be patient and I'll get to the good stuff when it's nice and ready. ^_^


	3. Part Three

I Left the Womb for This

Part 3

Angelica smiled sadly as she wandered down the still familiar streets of her old neighborhood, lost in nostalgia. The old corner store had closed down and it's dirty bordered up windows spoke to her in memories and faceless voices. The park where she had played as a baby was beginning a collection of graffiti, looking at it now she was surprised her mother had let her touch it. Then again her mother hadn't been the most attentive parent choosing to instead shower her only child with money and gifts instead of love. The worst thing was it worked; Angelica had grown up spoilt and shallow. She'd only realized this toward the end of high school when a good loving mother was the only thing she really needed.

            Shaking the thought of her mother out of her mind Angelica continued through the suburban sprawl. Up and down streets with perfectly manicured lawns, identical houses, identical letterboxes. Everything was just so normal, so insanely flawless; Angelica could hardly believe she'd been brought up in this all American suburb. She had known so little about the world when she had left for college, known so little about people and how easily they could manipulate her. In this sleepy little suburb she had been the manipulator, she had been the one with the power. How the tables turned, she would tell herself bitterly after spending the night crying her wounds away.

            It was such a clichéd story, the kind you'd find in a daytime soap opera or drugstore novel. She was the heartless shrew; he was the lovely, handsome, witty man who would steal her heart. He'd tell her everything was okay, he'd be gentle, and steal her innocence away. Then, without her even realizing it he'd eat away at her self confidence, make her feel worthless and pitiful. He'd crush her heart and spirit and she'd become bitter and resentful and hurt so many others in her own downward spiral into loathing and self doubt. Yeah, she'd been hurt bad and she found herself regretting a lot of things though she vowed never to regret anything. It's so pointless, she'd say, who has time for regrets when there's so much life to live? Well, she did for one.

            She sighed and shook her head, so overwhelmed with emotion she felt a lump form in her throat. She swallowed it hastily and looked up from the sidewalk at the houses around her. Without even realizing it she had walked right into the street where she had grown up, and three houses up, looming over her like some omen of death was the house she had grown up in. She didn't spend long looking at it preferring to instead, forget the memories that bubbled in her skull. She was however, perfectly happy to fondly remember her neighbor Harold. Sweet, dorky Harold, no matter how nasty she was to him he'd always remain loyal. Even toward the end of her high school days when she had alienated herself from her friends, he'd still sit at the end of her bed and listen while her parents fought and she bitched and whined. Out of everyone she knew growing up in this neighborhood Harold was the one she missed the most. 

            "Angelica?" She swiveled around slowly; her wistful smile still spread across her lips and met Harold's calm doe eyes.

            "Harold?" It seemed somehow natural he should show up just when she was thinking about it, like she had beckoned him to her.

            "Sweet Jesus Henry Christ," He said, dropping the box he'd been carrying, "I don't believe it." And they hugged as if it had been something they did often, or at all.

            "When you left I thought that was the last I'd ever see of you, what are you doing back here? God there's so much to talk about? Are you going to college? Wow."

            Angelica just smiled wider and muttered, "It's so good to see you again."

            "Please," He said, picking up his box, which Angelica now released held a blender of all things, "Come inside."

            Angelica mechanically followed him past the cookie-cutter lawn and creepy garden gnomes that lined the pathway up to the two storey house. He flung the door open and ushered her inside, and the house looked exactly as it had two years ago.

            "I'm back," Harold shouted and there was a groaning of floorboards and a creaking of stairs as a woman, quite pregnant, navigated her way to the front door. Harold leaned over kissed her on the cheek and rubbed her round belly.

            "Did you get the blender?" She asked looking directly at the box Harold was holding, "Oh thank god, I've been craving smoothies all day."

            Angelica must've looked stunned because the pregnant woman gave her a weird stare and turned to Harold, "Who's this?" She asked in an undertone, as if Angelica didn't understand English. 

            "This is Angelica; she used to live just next door." The woman scoffed, grabbed the blender off Harold and waddled through the hall toward the kitchen.

            "She gets moody," Harold explained with a sigh, "But not too much longer, we're expecting any week now."

            Angelica didn't say anything, she resolved herself to nodding good naturedly and smiling. She couldn't believe Harold was married? And expecting a baby. It was shocking really, but when she thought about it she really shouldn't be so surprised. Harold was such a softie and so loving, of course he'd want to start a family as soon as he could.

            "So, tell me everything Angelica, where'd you move to. You left so suddenly, then I find out your parents were divorced."

            "Dad and I moved to California and, I don't know about Mom."

            "California? Wow like Hollywood?" Angelica smiled and reminded herself she'd been this naive once.

            "No, Orange County. OCU has one of the best journalism and writing courses in America."

            "So you're going to college now?"

            "Yeah, one more year."

            "Wow, I didn't even bother with college. I opened a milk bar down by the high school and business has always been great." 

            So that's why the corner store was closed down, Angelica thought bitterly, of course. 

            "So where's your mom now?" Harold asked happily

            "I don't know," Angelica replied, "I don't really talk to her much anymore."

            "Oh." Harold tired to look sad, but he didn't succeed well. Angelica was glad he changed the subject. They talked for hours, interrupted only once by Harold's wife who screamed at him that the blender wasn't working. The next time Angelica checked her watch it was six o'clock and the sun was sinking into the horizon.

            "I better get going Harold, it's getting late." Angelica said suddenly, cutting Harold off in the middle of a story about a high school punk who tried shoplifting in his store.

            "It's been so good talking to you Angelica; we should get together again before you go back to college." Harold said as she wandered out the door, chased by his wife's dark glares. 

            "Yeah sure," Angelica said tiredly and strolled down the pathway. She doubted she'd be going back there again. Harold's happy ignorant life annoyed her and his wife kept muttering behind her back. Some things were better left as memories.

* * * *

Since her breakdown after art class Chuckie noticed a change in Kimi. It was a subtle change, unnoticed by her friends. He knew Kimi a lot better than any of her friends did, he knew her moods, knew her patterns. And right now he knew something was out of whack. Something had broken in her that day, some enlightenment had reached her and the warmth in her smile and the sparkle in her eye seemed to have died. 

            These were, of course, only things that he could see. On the outside she was her same perky, happy self. Sometimes a little different, but not so much so that people didn't respect and like her. She was the perfect balance of MTV and non-conformism. She'd talk about clothes and boys with her friends, but every now and then comment on something odd and out of place. Her friends called these her 'Dil moments.' 

            Although Dil was younger than them he was notorious throughout the entire school. He was the ultimate non-conformist. He was the weird, strange, wacky, nutty, red headed Pickles whose thought pattern seemed undecipherable. He went so far beyond normal that he looped right back around to cool. He didn't even seem to mind that no-one in his year level was game enough to try holding an understandable conversation with him. It was often thought he did this on purpose to alienate people, but no-one was really sure. And that was how it was with Dil, no-one was really sure about anything that he did. So when something was mentioned for no reason, when conversation took a turn toward the strange, they were known as Kimi's 'Dil moments.'

            One thing that people did seem to notice about Kimi's change was her increase in 'Dil moments.' She would space out during perfectly routine gossip sessions and when asked a question would answer with another question about a popular cartoon or classic jazz band. Before this point her fashion hadn't always been considered normal, but it was at that certain level of strange which she could always reach that made it strangely cool. Since her change, her clothes became even more mismatched, disheveled and second hand looking than ever. Many people were convinced she had started making her own clothes, and that was too Dil for them to comprehend.

            By this point, of course, it all became irrelevant because school was over. Chuckie looked out over the crowd of teachers, parents, siblings and strangers here for the food from his place on the middle row of the stairs they had mounted on the podium for graduation. Below him the valedictorian, Elizabeth Von Rurik, was making a half hearted speech about the future and the importance of a good education. It was a complete load of hypocritical bull shit because he knew Elizabeth, and he knew her loathing for 'the system.' He knew despite her intellect, she'd end up just like him, earning minimum wage in a shitty job with a failed band and desiccated dreams of 'sticking it to the man.' 

            She finished her speech by giving the finger to the principal and spitting into the crowd. Very dramatic, very pointless but so punk rock. The graduates cheered and bounded off the stage, all throwing their hats and robes into the air. Parents cried, teachers congratulated, and Chuckie was mobbed by his friends who slapped him on the back and reminded him how little faith they had in him.

            "Never thought you'd make it man," Said Phil with a purposely hard slap on his shoulder.

            "Never thought you would either Deville, I suppose you only got into college with that football scholarship right?" Chuckie replied, rubbing his shoulder.

            "Yeah right," Phil snorted, "Did you ever see me play football Finster? I'm not wasting my time in any fancy college."

            "Let me guess, you're going to be a man and lift heavy things for a living?" 

            "Hey lifting things doesn't make you a man Finster, you should know that. Shooting people makes you a man. I'm gonna be a cop." Phil puffed out his chest proudly

            "You? A Pig?" Chuckie laughed hoarsely, "You can't even obey the law let alone enforce it." Phil joined him in laughter

            "You don't have to obey the law to be a cop." 

            "Touché," Chuckie grinned and Phil slapped him on the back one more time before moving on to another group of people. Glad to have escaped from the throng of people, Chuckie began making his way home. He got to the school gates and saw Kimi sitting on a nearby bench, her diploma in her hands. Chuckie could tell immediately there was something wrong, anyone could have told by the way her head hung and her shoulders slumped.

"Kimi?" He said tentatively, sitting beside her.

            "They want me to go to summer school. If I don't pass this class there's no way I'll get into college." Kimi said in an oddly high pitched voice.

            "You want to go to college?" 

            "I don't know, but I better leave my options open hadn't I?" 

            "So you're going to take the class?"

            Kimi sighed and looked at him, her eyes searching, pleading, as if he held all the answers to the universe but was keeping them from her. Looking at her like this, it was more than obvious to Chuckie her results had scarred her deeper than just the surface. It wasn't just a mark to her, there were attachments, and there was a hidden meaning that only she knew. Failing that class had consequences that weren't related to jobs or college, it had damaged her pride, her confidence, it had unearthed something that had, for a long time, been hidden in the depths of her subconscious. She had realized something, though what it was Chuckie could never really comprehend. There was only so much he could know about her, even if it was substantially more than anyone else, he could never know everything.

            "Don't tell anyone, please Chuckie." She said finally, hanging her head again

            "I won't." And he got up to leave

            "Wait," Kimi said, and in that second her doubts and fears were once again hidden behind her clever mask, "do you know my friend Ginny?"

            "Virginia Lawson?" Chuckie asked, perplexed.

            "Yeah, you've met her haven't you?" 

            "Yeah I've talked to her a few times, why?"

            "What do you think?"

            "Huh?" 

            Kimi grinned cheekily, remnants of her old glint returning to her eyes. "What do you think about her?" Her eyes widened suggestively

            "She's alright I guess," Chuckie replied defensively, frowning at Kimi's unprecedented change of attitude.

            "How alright?" She wiggled her eyebrows and Chuckie frowned deeper

            "Alright," Chuckie repeated

            "Would you consider hooking up with her?" 

            "What? Where did this come from?" Chuckie was now thoroughly suspicious. Kimi had never tried to set him up with anyone. He just knew it had something to do with his failed date the other week. Kimi was pitying him.

            "You said you wanted to get laid right? She just broke up with her boyfriend and is looking for casual rebound sex. Now's your chance."

            "What would make you think she'd want to have casual rebound sex with me?" Chuckie started indignantly 

            "Trust me she'd do anyone." Kimi replied knowledgably, "She's got no standards whatsoever."

            "Oh I get it," Chuckie said furiously, "It'd only take a slut with no standards to get me laid."

            "No Chuckie, I didn't mean it like that." Kimi said quickly, "She said she's always thought you were kinda cute."

            "You're just saying that." Chuckie said and, fed up with the conversation, spun on his heel and continued his journey home.

            "No really Chuckie, she's not even that much of a slut, she's only ever had sex once. She's really cool you'd like her a lot if you got to know her." Kimi pleaded walking one pace behind him

            "Only had sex once? I thought you said she had a boyfriend." 

            "They were only dating for like three weeks." 

            "Why did they break up?"

            "Who knows!" Kimi said exasperated, "He was probably just using her for sex. He was a bit of a prick to her."

            This seemed to soften Chuckie up somewhat and he fell silent.

            "Well if she thought I was so cute why didn't I know of this earlier?" He said after a few pensive moments

            "Well she's kinda shy when it comes to guys, she reckons she never knows what to say to someone she likes." He fell silent again and Kimi knew he was considering his options, "Look Chuckie, I'll invite her to Tommy's party tonight and you can talk to her then okay? If you don't like her than, fair enough, but she really is pretty cool and even if it is just sex I'm sure she'll be okay with it."

            Chuckie nodded his head slightly and Kimi squealed with delight

            "Chuckie's gonna get laid!"

            "Shut up."

* * * *

"How can you guys just sit there and play videogames? We just finished high school!" Lil said as she passed Phil's room where he and Tommy sat engrossed in a violent and somewhat perverted fighting game. Dil was hanging over the side of Phil's bed, upside down of course, reading an old French magazine he had found while raiding their attic. 

            "How can we not?" Phil replied at length, not once removing his eyes from the scantly dressed fighting girls on the screen.

            "I thought you were going to Tommy's house," Lil said, walking down the hallway to the bathroom

            "We are, are you still coming?" Tommy said, glancing at the now empty doorway.

            "Ha! Gotcha!" Phil yelled and the TV proudly pronounced 'You lose,' 

            "No I'm going to Sam Hill's party; most of the school is going to be there." Lil shouted from the bathroom

            "Oh well looks who's suddenly too good for us." Phil said scampering over to the bathroom and looking at Lil in the mirror

            "I'm not going for long; I just have to make an appearance." Lil said, carefully applying generous amounts of eye liner, "You should come too, Kathleen's gonna be there for sure."

            "Why would he care if Kathleen was there?" Tommy said in fake ignorance, Lil glanced at him in the mirror and he grinned

            "Yeah why should I care," Phil repeated huffily and Lil grinned along with Tommy

            "She told me she likes you, you know." Lil said blinking her eyes a few times and surveying her reflection

"Yeah right, we're just friends." Phil said weakly, there was no way he and Kathleen could be a thing

            "Come off it Phil, I've seen the way you two act around each other, it's like watching some weird Discovery Channel documentary."

            "The only hint he's gonna get," Tommy said mockingly, "Is the unexpected hit of Cherry in the new Cherry Coke."

            "How do we act?" Phil said, ignoring Tommy

            "You're both hot for each other, just admit it Phil you like her." Lil turned on him and stared him in the eye

            "Yeah I like her, like a friend." 

            "You can't lie to me Phil," Lil said haughtily, "I know you like her more than a friend." And with that she stalked out of the bathroom and into her room.

            "I do not," Phil shouted at the hallway

            "Aww come on man," Tommy said as they walked back into Phil's room and took their places in front of the TV, "You don't have to be shy."

            "Okay so maybe I like her a little bit, but it's not like we'll ever be a thing." Phil said defensively, "I mean can you imagine me with a girlfriend?"

            "According to Cest la Vie, the best way to court your love is to feed her aphrodisiacs such as oysters, chocolate and strawberries with cream." Dil piped up from the bed, "Strawberry oysters with chocolate sauce and whipped cream. I'd try it."

            Tommy wasn't surprised but Phil looked at Dil in surprise, "You can understand that?" 

            "Highs school French my boy," Dil replied without looking up from the magazine.

            "Just talk to her man," Tommy said, disregarding Dil's advice, "Lil reckons she likes you."

            "I talk to her every day Tommy, what am I supposed to say?" 

            "I don't know, it'll come to you." 

            "Very helpful," Phil muttered starting another game, but his mind was elsewhere and Tommy beat him in a flurry of short skirts and disproportioned body party. 

* * * *

AN: Yay, they finished school! The plot continues. And looky looky, I've even started with the romance slightly! There's still much more to be covered so stay tuned! Oh and if anyone is willing to be my Beta drop me a line at kawaiikitty_01@hotmail.com and please put beta reader or something as the subject coz I'm a little wary of emails these days. Thankies heaps! 


	4. Part Four

I Left the Womb for This

Part Four

Why did Tommy ignore her like this? What had she done to him? Had she upset him somehow? He looked perfectly happy, if not a little lethargic. She knew him; when he was mad at her he was mad at everyone else. He wasn't mad at everyone else, he didn't look grumpy or sulky, he looked _perfectly happy_. Why, then, hadn't he said a word to her all night?

She'd showed up with Chuckie, albeit a little late because Ginny had taken longer than necessary in the shower, but showed up none the less. She couldn't think of anything at all she'd done to upset him. Was he freaked out now because of her episode at school? As far as she knew he hadn't seen or heard anything of it, well knowing their school and her brother, he'd most likely have heard something but he hadn't shown any signs.

Why don't you just go talk to him? Her mind reasoned but she quickly blocked the thought out. She was confident in her and Tommy's relationship, maybe he was just busy with everyone else, and there were a few people at his house tonight. She was sure he'd find time to come talk to her, and if he didn't, she knew then that something was definitely wrong.

The night wore on and she crumbled, though by this time trying to initiate a conversation with her long time boyfriend was basically fruitless. He was already intoxicated, and when she approached he looked uncomfortable and defensive.

"Hey Tommy, umm, congratulations hey" Kimi said nervously. Since when had she been nervous around her own boyfriend?

"Yeah we finished high school," Tommy replied with the slightest hint of sarcasm.

"Look," Kimi said after a brief pause, "I've been meaning to talk to you all night."

"Not now Kimi," Tommy interjected, "Can't this wait till tomorrow? We're supposed to be celebrating."

He stared at her, his brows furrowed but his eyes unreadable. Kimi opened her mouth to retort but he turned away before she could speak. Chuckie had just sat down next to him, a stupid grin on his face.

"I'm gonna do it," Chuckie said to the opposite wall, "I'm really gonna get laid tonight,"

He turned to face Kimi, the grin still plastered on his face.

"Thanks Kimi you're a life saver."

"Yeah," Tommy slurred taking another large gulp from his beer, "Chuckie's been suffering from a severe case of blue balls."

Chuckie's smile faltered and he looked anxiously from Tommy to Kimi and then to the beer can in Tommy's hand. He shrugged, and Kimi was thankful he had let it slide this time. He huffed and stood up, gave Kimi one last fleeting look, who shrugged back sadly.

"That was really uncalled for Tommy," Kimi said quietly

"I told you, not now," Tommy said, now with anger definitely lacing his tones.

"When then, Tommy, you haven't spoken to me all night," Kimi replied, trying to keep the emotion out of her voice, "Are we okay?"

Tommy didn't reply, he instead drained the beer he'd been drinking and threw the can at the wall. He stood up without looking at her and walked away. Kimi bit her lip in an attempt to stop the tears now welling up in her eyes. Before she could embarrass herself by breaking down in front of all her friends, she stood up and purposefully made a beeline for the door. She met Lil on her way out, who'd obviously just arrived with an excited looking blond girl in tow. Kimi didn't stop, or even make eye contact and she was glad to reach the darkness of the street beyond the yard. She heard Lil call after her but there was no way she was turning back now. Not entirely sure where she was going she wandered down the street, the sounds of their graduation party fading into the night, her tears making hot salty paths down her cheeks.

Back at the party Chuckie remained blissfully unaware of his sisters' turmoil. Virginia had spent most of the night staring at him from over the punch bowl. He knew because every time he glanced up at her she'd quickly look away, a blush spreading up her face. When he was sure she'd drunk just enough punch to be tipsy, but not totally drunk, he decided to make his move. He sidled over to her, running through his head all the funny witty pick up lines he'd been reciting since that morning. He would've made the best impression too if it hadn't been for Angelica, who stamped on his doc martins causing him to stumble into the trestle table holding the snacks and beverages.

"What the hell is your problem?" He raged at her, wiping guacamole on his jeans. He chanced a glance at Virginia who was trying not to look at him.

"Calm down Finster," She said with a very Angelica grin, "I knew you'd gone off the rails but I didn't know you'd crashed that hard."

"Shut up," He growled through clenched teeth, looking at her properly for the first time through slit lids. She had changed more than he'd expected and it caught him off guard. Her hair which used to be so perfectly manicured was bunched haphazardly on top of her head. There wasn't a trace of makeup on her face and he couldn't be sure but he thought he saw a hole in her nose where a nose ring may once have sat.

"Come on now Chuck, we're like siblings, where's the love?" She grabbed him in a rough one arm hug and attempted to ruffle his hair, which was already so ruffled and unwashed she didn't make much of a dent.

"Come off it, the only sibling you've got is the devil." He said, extracting himself from her grip. Virginia was now talking animatedly to Phil and Chuckie felt that all too familiar sinking feeling in his gut which meant he'd bombed out once again.

"That's a bit harsh Finster; you're not the only one who's changed their ways." Angelica replied, the humor draining from her voice.

Thankfully Lil chose that exact moment to appear, squealing, and hug Angelica. Chuckie ducked out of the way trying his best to lose himself amongst the people crowded around the snack table. He hadn't escaped that easily though, Lil grabbed his collar and dragged him back to where she and Angelica were deep in concerned conversation. Chuckie looked pleadingly over to where Virginia was standing and felt his heart skip a beat. Phil was now thoroughly absorbed in another girl, leaving Virginia looking left out and confused.

"Chuckie, Kimi just ran out, she looked like she was crying," Lil said, taking a very short break from her conversation with Angelica, "And look," She pointed over to where Tommy was slouching against a wall, only barely holding himself up and draining another can of beer.

"Yeah Tommy's been real weird lately," Said Chuckie only half interested.

"He's pissed," She Angelica, a definite note of humor in her voice

"It's not funny Angelica, I think him and Kimi had a fight," Lil said, obviously distressed.

"Yeah probably, but Kimi's been weird lately as well," Said Chuckie, "She'll be alright."

"Can't you go and talk to him." Lil pleaded

"No way," Chuckie replied shaking his head, "Unless you haven't noticed I'm _trying _to hook up."

Lil and Angelica both looked taken aback by his comment. Angelica then laughed loudly and slapped him hard on the back.

"Right Finster, as if you could ever hook up with anyone other than your mirror."

"I would," Chuckie replied just as loudly, stepping out of Angelicas slapping arm length, "If you two would just leave me alone for a minuet."

Lil frowned and shook her head, but acquiesced.

"Go on then," She said, "It's probably better if we did it anyway, we've got just a bit more tact."

"Whatever," Chuckie mumbled and stomped over to where Virginia was leaning against a wall, looking thoroughly put out.

"Hey Chuckie," She said brightly

"Wanna go somewhere and talk?" He said, a little bit rougher and angrier than he intended.

Virginia looked scared for a moment but recovered quickly. Chuckie glared one last time at Angelica, who was now calling Tommy over to her and Lil. He scoffed noticeably, starting to feel slightly guilty for leaving Tommy to Angelica and Lil, but shrugged it off quickly and leading Virginia upstairs to Tommy's room where he sat down moodily on the bed.

"What do you wanna talk about then?" He asked glaring at the ground.

"I dunno," She said hovering by the door once again looking like she'd made a big mistake.

"I'm sorry," He sighed catching her expression and feeling decidedly guilty, "This night isn't exactly turning out how I planned."

"Me neither," She said truthfully, very carefully setting her drink down on a messy dresser, "I'm starting to wish I'd gone to Sam Hill's party."

"I'm starting to wish I'd never been born," Chuckie mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing, look, here come sit down," Chuckie knocked a pair of underwear off the bed and shuffled over so she could sit down next to him, "You're really pretty."

He cringed inwardly at his remark. Not only did it not sound sincere but he sounded like the biggest idiot saying that. He kicked himself mentally wondering where all his witty pick up lines had gone. Damn Angelica.

"Thanks," She mumbled and they fell into an awkward silence.

Chuckie picked at some dried food or something that was stuck to his jeans while Virginia looked nervously at the posters plastering Tommy's walls.

"I never realized Tommy was such a connoisseur." She commented, staring at a clockwork orange poster with admiration.

"Yeah bet you want to marry him now." Chucky said miserably

"You know," She said, her voice high, "You're sister always goes on about how nice you are, but quite frankly I can't see at all what she's talking about."

"What, because I'm not a connoisseur like Tommy?" He shot back standing up and glaring at her accusingly.

"No, because you're an asshole." She shouted back, springing to her feet her fists clenched at her sides.

"Yeah I bet you'd give anything to be here with Tommy instead, or Phil, I saw you ogling him back there!" Chuckie flung his arm out and Virginia flinched, "My sister said you were a slut but I didn't realize the problem ran that deep."

Virginia didn't even hesitate. She slapped him hard across the face turned and, seeing Tommy standing disbelieving in the doorway, grabbed him and kissed him furiously before stalking off down the hall.

"What was that all about?" Tommy said, somewhat sobered.

"Mind your own damn business, connoisseur." Chuckie spat, storming out the door and following Virginia down the hall.

Tommy awoke the next morning blearily, his mouth tasted like vomit and his stomach gurgled menacingly. He tried sitting up but his head swam and he wretched. He moaned incoherently for a moment, and then flopped back down onto his pillow. He couldn't remember a lot of last night but what he did remember didn't sit very well with him. He was quite sure Kimi would never talk to him again, and Chuckie, though he wasn't quite sure of the reasoning for the latter. Angelica and Lil had thoroughly embarrassed him by taking his tenth can of beer out of his hand and sending him up to bed. And he could've sworn he saw Phil kissing some blond girl on his way up the stairs. Everything was wrong.

He tried sitting up again, a little slower than before. His head still ached and his stomach still turned somersaults but he managed a little better than last time.

"Morning star shine," Dil piped up from the hall, sniggering as he passed.

Tommy groaned in reply and attempted to swing his feet out of bed, feeling his gut churn.

"Ah there's my little booze hound." Angelica said happily, edging her way into the room a plate full of toast and bacon balanced on her hand, "Brought you breakfast."

"Angelica, I can't eat!" Tommy said, standing up quickly and regretting it.

"Hey come on, this is the best hangover food. Trust me," She thrusted the plate under Tommy's nose who felt sick at the smell.

"Anyway it's my fault you've got a hangover in the first place." Angelica prattled on, "I supplied the booze remember. Plus you don't wanna have to confront Kimi with a hangover; she looks like she's gonna murder you."

"Kimi's here?" Tommy said, feeling a wave of sickness that had nothing to do with his hangover.

"Damn straight," Angelica said, "I don't know if you remember what you said to her last night but she's ready to kill."

Tommy groaned again and pushed the plate of bacon back into Angelicas chest. He clenched his jaw and, strengthening his resolve, strode out into the hall and down the stairs.

"Fine, but you'd be better off with a full stomach when you face her," Angelica called after him, her mouth full of toast.

Tommy stared for a moment from the bottom of the stairs as Dil bobbed around Kimi, who was sitting deflated on the couch. Clenching his jaw again Tommy shooed Dil away and, tentatively, took a seat next to Kimi on the couch. He didn't look at her at first, trying had to recall what he'd said to her last night, and trying to remember when he'd started feeling so detached from her. When he managed to look over at her she was staring at him, her eyes full of tears, and her lip trembling.

Tommy's heart swelled and he automatically reached out a hand to comfort her. She shrunk away from his gesture, biting her lip in an obvious attempt to stem the flow of tears.

"Look Tommy, I'm just gonna say this and get it over with." Kimi started, her voice shaking

"Kimi please-" Tommy started, but she cut him off before he could go any further.

"No Tommy, I know what you're feeling. I mean its obvious isn't it, the way you've been ignoring me lately. I just want to say that, even though I haven't stopped feeling for you, I understand if you want to…" She trailed off trying her best to stifle her sobs.

"Kimi it's not that I-" Tommy tried but once again Kimi cut him off

"No Tommy there's no need to explain. People just change I know. I don't want this to be harder than it has to be. I don't want us to get weird, that's what I was worried about when we first started dating," She seemed to be babbling now in an attempt to stop herself from crying, "But I guess there's nothing to be done about it. This doesn't mean we can't still be friends it's just that well… I guess it's over."

Tommy couldn't speak. His mouth hung open stupidly as he stared at Kimi's tear stained face. His head still pounded painfully but it now seemed second to the pounding of his heart. It's true he'd questioned his feelings for Kimi but he never seriously meant to end it with her. He needed her, especially now that he was feeling so _down_. He couldn't explain it, especially to her, the confusion, the angst. He didn't know what was happening to him. And she didn't give him a chance to explain. Before he could form any coherent thought she stood up and with one last goodbye left his life for good.

AN:

I'm back. Sorry it took so long (What is it like two years) since the start of this fic. I was going back through my docs and here it is. I really do like it and I like where it's going. BTW thanks to everyone who reviewed o.O Anyway if you're still interested I might just get this thing finished one day. Considering it only took me like an hour to write this one chapter. Umm I guess that's all from me. Enjoy.


	5. Part Five

I Left the Womb for This

Part 5

Kimi walked for a long time that morning, not wanting to be anywhere in particular. She stopped for a while at the empty high school, wishing as the tears rolled down her cheeks that she could be back there, happy, with Tommy and her friends. Everything so was easy in high school, there was no sadness, there were no abrupt changes. Everyone was happy and normal and she and Tommy were still together.

As much as Tommy had hurt her last night and this morning, and indeed for the last couple of weeks as their relationship fell apart, she still wished they were together. She kept thinking if only she'd tried a bit harder, been a bit more attentive maybe they could've worked it out. She even considered briefly going back there and begging him to take her back, but thankfully her sane brain kicked in before she could embarrass herself. It was over, she kept telling herself over and over again, he's never gonna take you back.

She started blaming herself as she pounded the pavement, ignoring everything that happened around her. Then she started blaming him, growing angry and resentful and balling her fists and wanting to scream. Eventually she sat down under a shady tree in a park and cried until her lungs hurt and her eyes burned. She hated this life, the real world, the world outside everything she found comforting and bearable. If this is what life has to offer she wished she'd never grown up.

She didn't want to go home, have to face her mom and Chuckie and their inevitable questions and sympathy. But she didn't want to stay here, alone, afraid and crying in this park surrounded by onlookers. She decided on going home, trudging slowly the familiar path. Her mind raced with thoughts, trying desperately to make sense of this confusing day, trying to comprehend and understand what had gone so wrong. Her heart pounded in her throat and she felt a gaping hole in her stomach that she was sure was never going to go away. She couldn't believe one person could cry so much and thought wildly that she might shrivel up from loosing too much water.

When she reached the house she met Chuckie at the door. He looked almost as sad as she did but she couldn't spare a feeling for him.

"Kimi?" He said, staring dazedly at her, "What's the matter?"

"I d-don't wanna talk about it Chuckie," She managed to croak out, her throat was so sore from crying.

She tried to get past him but he wouldn't let her.

"Come on Kimi; look at you, what happened, was it Tommy?" Chuckie said holding her shoulders and trying to get her to look at him.

At the mention of Tommy's name fresh tears welled up and she collapsed onto Chuckie's shoulder. He held her fast and stroked her head while she sobbed into his shirt.

"I j-just d-don't know w-what happened." She wailed as Chuckie lead her up the stairs to her room.

Chuckie seemed unable to speak, his jaw clenched tight. Thankfully Kira chose that moment to poke her head concernedly through the door.

"I heard someone crying…" She trailed off, seeing Kimi's hunched form, "Kimi sweetie what's the matter?"

Taking his leave Chuckie left mother and daughter, muttering something about going to Phil's house. Kimi sobbed now into her mothers shoulder, feeling for the first time that day, as her mother cooed into her ear, that she might be able to get past this. Just maybe.

Phil was getting fed up. Lil had not stopped cooing over him and Kathleen the whole morning. If he heard the words 'so cute' one more time he was going to be sick. She kept drilling into his brain how he needed to concentrate hard while driving. Well how was he supposed to concentrate while she was waffling in his ear the whole time? So he had kissed Kathleen… a few times last night. What was so damn exciting about that, that Lil had to go completely mental over it? Wasn't she the one who set them up in the first place, what was she expecting for him to just sit there and hold her hand? They weren't in junior high anymore; they weren't even in high school anymore. He was a man now; he could kiss whoever he pleased. 

"I just can't get over how _cute _you two were!" Lil squealed from somewhere in her uninterrupted commentary about the whole party last night, "I don't think Chuckie got so lucky, as if he could ever hook up with anyone, girls don't like angry boys you know Phil, you better keep that in mind if you're gonna get serious with Kathleen."

Phil had had enough. He slammed on the breaks almost throwing Lil completely from her seat. She squealed but, thankfully remained quiet afterwards.

"Would you shut it?" Phil said, trying to keep the anger from his voice, "I was at the party last night Lil, I know just as well as you do what happened."

Lil stared at him, shocked, before pointing in the rear view mirror, which showed at least five cars stopped behind them in the busy main street, some beeping their horns loudly, some even making rude gestures out of their windows.

"Sorry," Phil said starting the car again, "you were babbling and it was distracting me."

Lil still didn't speak, a sign of just how put out she was, having been thrown almost through the windscreen. The car filled with a thick silence and Phil began feeling guilty. He hadn't meant to loose his temper, he knew how much Lil loved to talk, and he was just angry and maybe a little embarrassed that she'd fly completely off the handle about him and Kathleen. Just because they kissed didn't mean they were a thing. I didn't mean anything except that they'd kissed.

"Can you take us home Phil," Lil said at length, a bit quieter than she normally would have, "I need to get ready for work."

Phil only nodded in reply, the guilt once again welling up in his chest. Thankfully by the time they got home Lil had recovered from her shock and had almost started waffling about Tommy's party last night. Phil only had to shoot her a withering glare before she got the point this time.

"Oh alright, I have to have a shower anyway, I can tell Anthony all about it when I get to work…" She continued talking to herself all the way up the stairs and into the bathroom.

"Hey Philly," Mrs. Deville appeared from somewhere in the kitchen, wiping her elbows with a dirty rag, "Was just fixing the plumbing in that damn sink again. Heard you've got a little girlfriend now hey?"

"Mom, I do not have a girlfriend, I can't believe Lil!" Phil blushed noticeably and made to storm up the stairs

"Ah there's no need to be embarrassed Philly," She said grabbing him hard and ruffling his hair, "by the way Chuckie's waiting for you upstairs, he looked a bit down, Chas has been worrying about him a lot lately."

"Yeah he's just going through a phase," Phil said rolling his eyes and trudging up the stairs.

It wasn't that he didn't like Chuckie. They were best friends, maybe not as best as Chuckie and Tommy, but still pretty good friends. Ever since Chuckie's abrupt change however Phil had, not stopped liking him, just started liking him less. He was moody, quick to anger and way too eager to prove himself. Like he was trying to make up for all the dorky stupid things he did when he was a kid. It was hard to hold a conversation with him without either feeling sorry for him or wanting to punch him in the nose. Everyone agreed, secretly behind his back, that the old Chuckie was _way _better than the new one.

"Hey Chuck," Phil said walking into his room, taking another controller and entering the game Chuckie was playing. They played in silence for a while before Phil's character beheaded Chuckie's and the screen displayed the phrase 'Player two wins.'

"Hey Phil," Chuckie began at length, while they started a new game, "Have you talked to Tommy today?"

"Nah man why?"

"I dunno he seems kinda distant don't you reckon?"

"I guess so,"

"He broke up with my sister today."

"Really?" Phil was already getting fed up with this conversation. He knew any minuet it would turn into some depressing tirade about how Chuckie misses Tommy and blah blah, who cares.

"Yeah."

They lapsed into silence once more and Phil beat Chuckie two more times. He started feeling extremely uncomfortable, thankful for the distraction that was Lil shouting she was leaving. Chuckie obviously didn't feel as uncomfortable. He sat with complete ease; maybe he was pondering something depressing or angry, or some boring way to waste Phil's day.

"Hey Phil," Chuckie started again and Phil cringed inwardly. "I saw you hooking up with that Kathleen chick last night."

"Yeah I heard you bombed out pretty bad with that other chick."

"How do you do it man?" Chuckie dropped his controller and stared at the floor. 'Here we go' thought Phil, "I mean you don't even need to try and this girl's all over you. I can't seem to hook up no matter how hard I try."

"Maybe you should stop trying so hard?" Phil ventured, trying to stop himself from saying all the things that were really on the tip of his tongue

"I've tried that as well," Chuckie sighed, "That just lessens my chances."

They lapsed into another uncomfortable silence. Phil fidgeted, hoping, praying for a distraction. And just as Chuckie opened his mouth to speak the best distraction Phil could've hoped for walked through the door.

"Kathleen!" He practically shouted at her as he sprung from the bed. She looked taken aback, but still happy.

"I'm not interrupting anything am I?" She asked, peering over Phil's shoulder at Chuckie, who stared morosely back.

"No, not at all, Chuckie was just leaving weren't you man?" Phil motioned violently at the door with his head, praying Chuckie would just leave without a word.

"Yeah, good seeing ya," He said to Kathleen who nodded silently back. He walked out of the room, head down and shoulders hunched.

"What's up with him?" Kathleen said as soon as she was sure he was out of ears shot.

"Don't ask," Phil replied rolling his eyes again.

"Angelica could you be a sweetie and buy some things for me from the corner shop?" Angelica looked up from her place on the couch, Didi with her graying hair was standing in the doorway from the kitchen to the living room, yellow washing gloves on and a hastily written list in her hand.

"Sure," Angelica said, standing up and spreading crumbs over the freshly vacuumed floor. She looked down at her mess and felt only slightly guilty. She supposed she could make it up by dragging her ass down to the corner store in the middle of her favorite midday program.

"Just a few things we need for dinner tonight," Didi explained unnecessarily.

Angelica smiled and took the list. She had always been jealous of this side of the Pickle family. She even wished sometimes, in her later teen years, that she'd been born into this family rather than her own. Didi was such the typical stay at home and look after the kids mom. She cooked dinner every night and they all ate together like a postcard family. It all sounded very corny but Angelica thought maybe if her family had only done that more often they might still be a family.

Dinner at her dad's house was a sad affair. Mostly it was just her, alone, with a pizza or microwave dinners. When her father decided to grace her with his presence the food was never any better. And on the most embarrassing occasions he would bring some new girlfriend round for dinner and Angelica would be expected to cook for them. It wasn't much better when her parents were still together. Granted she never had to eat TV dinners, but the company wasn't much better. Whenever her parents tried to be civil and eat as a family it was usually interrupted by that god forsaken phone of her mothers, or otherwise chilly remarks between adults which was the very first signal of the imminent end.

As Angelica walked she found herself inadvertently stomping her feet, her anger rising quickly. As much as she tried she couldn't find peace with her parents divorce. She felt robbed. Robbed of her childhood, robbed of her adolescence and now starting to feel robbed of her prime. It was unfair she had to feel so angry and put out about the affairs of two grown adults like her parents. If her mother wanted to go and have sex with Jonathon then good for her, why did Angelica have to suffer for it? She wished at times like these she could just turn off all her emotions and just get over it.

But she couldn't, so she just settled for stomping. Damn her mother, that inattentive bitch. Damn her father, that spineless worm. Damn Didi and Dru, the picture perfect family. Damn therapy and drugs and boys and work. Damn it all.

"What're you stomping about?"

Angelica practically jumped at Chuckie's voice. She hadn't realized she'd reached the corner store already, and it seemed Chuckie wasn't the only one who'd realized her stomping. A group of misfit looking kids were chuckling at her from over by the dumpster. Chuckie was sitting on the railing which went up the wheelchair access, his fiery hair obscuring half his face.

"Mind your own business Finster," Angelica snapped, her anger still bubbling on the surface.

"Geez someone's got PMS." He mumbled, glancing over his shoulder at the group of kids, who had settled on point menacingly at Chuckie.

"What're you doing here anyway?" Angelica said, trying to calm herself down.

"Applying for a job, what'd you think?" Angelica rolled her eyes at Chuckie's sarcasm, "It's all anyone thinks I can do anyway."

Angelica was taken aback somewhat by Chuckie's depressing manner. What a moody kid. One minuet he's exploding with rage, the next he's totally deflated.

"There's no shame in working in retail," Angelica said in a would be chirpy voice, she only managed to sound sarcastic, "Back home I work at this crappy convenience store while I'm at college."

"Whoopdy doo," Chuckie mumbled, once again glaring over his shoulder at the group of kids.

"Do you know those people?" Angelica said, trying to keep the conversation going. She wasn't too keen on seeing Chuckie's attempted suicide outside the Seven Eleven.

"No," Chuckie replied angrily, "They keep calling me Sid Vicious and trying to spit on me though."

Angelica sighed. For the first time she actually felt genuinely sorry for Chuckie.

"Do you want me to go talk to them?" She asked, trying to sound as kind as she could

"I don't need you to stand up for me." He said frowning.

"Well at least come and help me get this stuff." She replied waving Didi's list in his face.

Chuckie grudgingly obliged, sliding off the railing and trudging in after her.

"I don't know what you're always so angry about Finster. It's not like life's been very hard to you, you know." Angelica said while deciding on which can of corn looked less suspicious.

"Right, this coming from princess Angelica." Chuckie huffed, "Just pick one, they're all the same!"

"Calm down. You know it's not like that anymore anyway. I don't even talk to my mom and it's not like my dad's particularly successful. He's just a pathetic divorcee."

"My dad used to be a pathetic divorcee." Chuckie growled

"I thought your mom died."

"Same thing."

"What I'm trying to say is, you've got nothing to be so upset about." Angelica said knowingly, moving onto canned asparagus.

"Apart from the fact that all my friends hate me." Chuckie regarded the asparagus with distaste, "Who eats this stuff anyway?"

"I don't know." Angelica said, moving on to the next item on the list and forgetting the asparagus, "And maybe you're friends wouldn't hate you so much if you weren't such an asshole."

"That's what all the girls say."

"Maybe because it's true. You've changed too much Finster. Whatever happened to the happy medium?"

"Guess it died with the happy family." He grinned at her slyly and she couldn't help but smile.

"Anyway," He continued, surveying Angelicas un-brushed hair and ripped jeans, "Who're you to be talking about the happy medium? Last time I saw you, you wanted to be Brittany Spears, and now what look are you going for? Heroine chic?"

"Ha ha," Angelica replied sarcastically, making her way toward the counter, "you're not looking much better you know, when was the last time you even washed your hair?"

"Who's counting?"

"What I'm trying to say," She continued with a roll of her eyes, "Is that you used to be this sweet little nerd and now you're putting on this tough guy act. For those of us who've had to put up with you for your whole life, it's just not working. You're not fooling anyone."

Chuckie didn't reply immediately, but considered what she'd said, a slight frown marring his features.

"Maybe," He said at length after Angelica had paid for their goods and they were walking through the derelict car park, "Maybe I got just a bit sick of being a 'sweet little nerd.' Maybe I just got fed up with everyone trying to protect me and… and feeling sorry for me. Maybe I just got sick of being myself."

"Well, you had friends who liked you for being yourself. You can't just stop being that person and expect them to still like whoever comes out of that weird brain of yours." Angelica explained patiently, "They're patient people, you're friends, but they've got their limits."

"Well I guess they can all just go to hell then." Chuckie said

"Guess so," Angelica said, trailing off.

They walked on in silence for a while, both completely lost in their thoughts. When they reached the Pickles house they both stopped abruptly and looked at each other uncomfortably.

"Wanna come in?" Angelica said, looking away from him

"No it's okay."

"Come in." She said more forcefully

"It's fine." He replied turning away, "I don't really feel like putting up with Tommy at the moment, he just broke up with Kimi."

"Suit yourself." Angelica said shrugging and wandering up the path.

Chuckie sighed noticeably and continued meandering down the street, lost once again in his thoughts.

A/N: wow two chapters in two days, aren't you guys lucky. Anyway getting on with the story a bit now, I might even be able to get into some of the more romantic smooshy bits soon! And we all know how much everyone loves romantic smoosh! Thanks again for the reviews. Hope you like.


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